The Questions You Aren't Allowed To Ask

Society frowns upon asking certain questions.  We aren't allowed to ask these questions because we aren't allowed to get truthful answers. The truth hurts. We soften the blow with white lies. "It's not you, it's me." really means you are bat shit crazy. Ironically, its the answers to these questions that would prove to be most helpful.

The question I have turning in my mind since Friday night seems innocent and simple. If we lived closer, would you want to see me again? It's a simple question that would be so telling. Is it me or the commute? If one of us weren't required to drive over an hour in not-so-nice traffic, would you want to find out more about me? If you didn't have to take out a second mortgage to afford gas, would you want to date me?

There are other questions I would like answered. The only person I can think of who would be able to answer them is probably not going to answer them. First of all, I think it would be helpful to have this conversation over a couple of beers. He'd do anything for a couple of beers (albeit, good beers). And since he lives in Arkansas now, I don't see that happening. Plus, I'm not sure he would be all about helping me date someone else. But this is how my imaginary conversation goes:  What did I do that drove you crazy? I'm sure a list would ensue.  I'd like an honest evaluation of where I fall on the high maintenance/low maintenance continuum. I like to think I'm not terribly high maintenance. I also think I'm probably way off on my self-assessment. Am I fun or do people just tolerate me? Do I really have a good sense of humor? Do I come off as a dumb girl, flighty, or otherwise annoying?

In every day conversation, I want to ask things like, "Do you like me?" A needy chick question, which apparently I am. I'd like a true evaluation of my physical appearance. Some days I like the way I look- a particular outfit, a good hair day, sometimes all it takes is lip gloss. Some days- I don't even recognize myself- pale skin, clothes that don't fit well, enough bags under my eyes to take a trip to Europe.

I thought this dating service might be able to offer some feedback. I'm afraid to ask but I think I'm at the point of deserving some. I'm going to have to bite the bullet and ask. The exchange of phone numbers would indicate some level of interest. But apparently that is another way to soften the blow. And I may just hear the proverbial, "It's not you....."